Living in Fear and Anxiety in the New India

This is a record of life as it is lived by an ordinary citizen of the new India. For whoever researches the life conditions of this country from the perspective of a single woman struggling to stay alive, protect and keep what is her own, and live with dignity. This is a first hand account from the citizen’s perspective, and the life lived would reflect the exact nature of social infra structure, the law and order situation, the politics of the country and the general condition of the community of a metro city in India under the current government in the State.

This post was brought about by the fact that, yesterday on my birthday, the bell rang in the quiet December evening when I was making tea for me and mother. All the other apartments around ours were empty and locked up as the inmates were out holidaying. I looked out the keyhole and could not see who it was, so I opened the door, saw that it was the woman from downstairs who had manhandled me in 2005, and had tried to strangle me by wrapping a thick shawl over my head. I tried to close the door without speaking to her. I had not invited her, spoken to her, we can have no business with her, and yet there she was at our door. Trouble started when I did not let her enter. She pushed against the door hard when she realized I was closing it making me struggle and go numb. I managed to force the door closed but before I could put the bolt on she put her whole weight against the door, simultaneously banging loudly and terribly on out door almost breaking it down. I realized she was trying to force her way in. I knew I had to call someone, I was afraid the way she was banging and pushing against the door it would cave in, and in fact some panels came loose, I called the police, but they were late in responding, by the time someone picked up the woman had retreated.


I told the policeman who picked up the phone but did not mention which police station I was calling, they never ever identify themselves, India does not teach its govt servants telephone etiquette especially in the service industry like in the Police. Anyways, they did not come but advised me to go report the incident to an address he mentioned – so am supposed to go there today. But as I do not wish to go alone, it will not be done I guess.


So that is when I realized in my moment of panic, that my best friend was not there to call. Sometimes it is great help if you attend the phone and just be with a person on the phone, telling them what to do and in fact you become witness to what is going on.


The greatest danger to any man in any community is threat to their life and property. I want this on record that ever since my father passed away in 2005, I have been living under both of these threats. Till the time the property issue is resolved and I can geographically move away, it would continue to be a threat and one fine day when they have a chance they would simply murder me, quietly and no one would even know. They would create some story to cover it up. My mother being abnormal, she is no help or support.


One way I figured after some thought to be safe to some extent is to work for really famous people. Then you are secure to some extent and people think twice about messing with you.


The original deeds of the property was taken away by the developer and was never returned to us. This was not an outright sale, according to the agreement it was a power of attorney given to build but not to dispose of the building as they saw fit. But they are collecting money, without registering as a society, for over ten years now, without creating a bank account for it, without filing for audit reports and sharing it with the inmates that they are collecting money from, the developer still occupies the building and uses it commercially, without our prior permission.


They recently took down our letter box, without intimating us, by letter or in any other manner. They changed the numbers of our apartments, on their own, without again informing or consent or intimating us. Our apartments are billed as Flat numbers 1C, 4C, but they changed that to 2A, and 5A! Just imagine in my own house, people come change the number of my own apartment, and actually tear down our letter box, (they did not even tell us where they kept the box, we had our lock on it, there might be mail inside the box!) put up new ones, extort money for that from you even though there is a building fund for it, or supposed to be, they tried to attack me when I refused to pay saying that they did not ask me if I needed a new one or they should take it out of the building fund, that is another time that man who had been with this woman trying to stangle me, there had been two people, the family of this man and the woman, came and I was alone in the house at that time).


This is India and life under the very able leadership of Ms Mamata Banerjee. I had originally thought that since they say she studied law and paints and writes poetry, and is a woman, atleast women’s lot would improve, on the contrary they are maintaining goons in their ranks so they can target the lives and property of helpless people and that is how they fund their party activities. This woman did not buy an apartment, she cannot afford to buy an apartment in such buildings. They cost hundred of thousand, even I cannot. Neither did that man – that man was brought here to live as caretaker originally when my father was alive. The woman was in the employ of an ex commissioner – she was paid to look after the old man. When he died, she took over the flat with the help of the local party.


So now my woes continue and it is traumatic to have to see her name inthe letter box in the same line as ours, the original owners of the land, and to have to live in the same building in such close proximity with a person that tried to murder you and constantly threatens and abuses and insults you is killing me everyday and soon I shall not be able to talk about this anymore because am growing numb with pain fear and anxiety.


I am unable to get out of the house because am depressed and am unable to leave the house for my job because they come and work on mother when am not in the house. Once when I arrived from Gujarat early mroning, I rang the bell, knocked on the door, banged loudly, the whole building heard me and yet the woman we are supposed to call ‘mtoher’ did not open up. I suspect this woman was sleeping in.


Their game is, they target a house in the nbeighbourhood that ha old people in it and there is some sort of dispute within the family and then they try to get friendly with that old person doing little odd jobs for them, little errands and get entry into the house, and try to take over.


Had the CPM governemt been in power this never would have happened. She would have had to leave, vacate the place soon as her employer died. And his next of kin would have taken over or it would have reverted to us the owners to compensate for the violations in our agreement the developer has made. and as owners we should be enjoying a separate exit and entry to the building not her.


Well, on my forty eight birthday, I realized that even though I had spoken about the dangers of my life to my best friend, he pretended not to understand or know. This needs to be recorded as the friends of that woman Mr Arun D (he was a local municipality worker, a party worker, the developer had used at some point, supposedly was my father’s friend and the first person I had called that fateful night for help) prevented me from making an FIR on that night saving her the first time and he is the one that used to visit her all the time and call her a “niece”.

He is an upper caste Bengali Hindu man with wife and children, she is a lower caste Nepali woman who never really had a husband, but at various points you could see men coming and spending the night at in her one room apartment (they did not have a curtain for a long time and the door is right in front of the lift, so anyone getting in or out of it can look in). He had said, to me that night, you know the only eye witness is your mother and if she does not corroborate your story you would be in trouble. Giving her a hint to be quiet about the incident. Manipulating my mother, an eye witness of the incident and suppressing it.

The woman was alone at first. In ten years I never saw a man in the house at least not till the time the employer was alive. Then one day after a few years of his death, a man started coming and living with her, occasionally. Now since last year he is permanently stationed here.

One thing about Indian marriages is, the men prefer to take the women away to THEIR homes after the marriage. This is the first time I witnessed the opposite, they were so eager to occupy that flat, that this woman was allowed to bring in a man to stay with her, so they could keep control of the apartment. This man could be working for the GNLF, be a spy or anybody – no one knows for sure but since it serves the purpose of keeping that woman here, and she serves the purpose of keeping me under constant threat, they are in the building.


By IPC, murder, as well a culpable murder is a punishable offence.


If they can, through these torture and threats and attacks can flush me out, they can get my mother to write away the property and that is what they will do.


I fear for my life and property is why I left this note here online for everyone to see. And know in case something happens to me, not that anyone cares but still.

I had to.

One other person has been told about these things and he happens to be a judge of a High Court of India. He is a friend of a friend.

The woman I live with and was raised to call ‘mother’, was witness to what happened last night, but did not say a word of protest or go out and inform the neighbours about what happened, making her a dangerous threat to me and my safety. A real mother, would be concerned about the safety of her daughter, a normal woman would be concerned about what happened yesterday. Her attitude clearly proves her psychotic tendencies and apathy and lack of normal human feelings or sense of responsibility or even a clear sense of right or wrong.

People trying to barge in into your apartment after dark, by normal standards is unacceptable. any other normal human being in that situation would call in people, and rally for support to ensure the safety of the person facing it, whether they are related to her or not – they would do it out of common humanity. This person lacks such capacities is why she is a threat to me and my property and should not be living with me and I need to be rescued from her presence. this last bit is for my “friend” to know and comprehend.

The post is a first draft, it would be edited once am actually out of the situation, right now am still a bit shaken an upset and I wrote this firts thing in the morning just while it is still fresh in my mind. Last night I was too distraught, but I did inform of it to my insurance officer, and one family upstairs. I told them they need not act upon it, but that I just am letting them know it happened on December 21, 2015, while the retelecast of the Jimmy Kimmel show was going on on TV. It was between 5:30pm and 6pm. Monday.

Something about the show, they show it as slotted for 1800 hrs, but it actually is aired here at 1730 or 1700 hours I think, I usually always catch it in the middle of it – today am going to try at 1700 hours and see what it is with the exact time for the retelecast. Donald Trump was the guest.

It is very cold and windy here this morning and am in despair – am not sure whether I should leave station and go join work out of town in such a situation even though reservations have been made and the plane ticket has arrived.


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